Thursday, 25 February 2016

I'm Ready Now

Hi.
So if you're a regular, or if you just stumbled upon this one post, then you may have realised that I have been pretty dormant since December (on this blog).
Well, my reasoning is quite cowardice but I thought I'd share it with you nevertheless.

I feel...different. Like, when I first started reading books, I felt like I'd found myself. Like a bad boy guy will come and speak with the quite and shy girl (I'm still holding out hope for this LOL). Then everything changed.

My music taste COMPLETELY changed (I went from Taylor Swift and 5 Seconds of Summer to My Chemical Romance, Paramore and Fall Out Boy). This, I guess, drastically was a factor. Why? Well it changed my output and insight of life- whilst looking at the world in frills and hope, I was (am) now looking at it in the true form. 
I guess this also changed my personality from going from reserved to really reserved.
Another thing is that a band (whose name will not be disclosed cause I don't want this going away from the actual purpose that is me explaining my absence) who I thought had saved me, whose lyrics I drew on my arms had said some stuff in a magazine about women. No, I'm not a feminist in the sense that I'll go out and protest (a die hard one)- I'm a simple feminist in that I believe that if men can do it, why not women? And they totally, totally degraded women. 
So then I fell apart...they made me feel confident (especially around boys, cause I had moved up to liking their standard and above) and I had a place to feel free..Not anymore. 
That void will always remain but it's slowly filling up.

My thoughts are super evil, too. I swear, if I was stranded on a desert island alone, I would die before I am dead.

My life COMPLETELY changed- I had plans to go to uni but then somehow got in a job, that's not going well at all. Aaaannddd it's a night shift so I had no time to read books or to blog- only study.

My reading habit COMPLETELY changed and here are some Tumblr posts that relate:


http://theclassicsreader.tumblr.com/post/139869462261/remember-when-i-used-to-not-be-so-busy-that-i

http://ny-98.tumblr.com/post/139531905315/suicidalghosts-is-still-v-excited-about-books


Despite all this, I will still find some time to read some books I still LOVE reading books infinitely :) Stay sweet, and happy (especially at life's meanies)